A client approached our coaching session last week with what he felt was a crucial confrontation that was just about to blow-up in his team. Here’s a little background and a new coaching perspective that we developed to deal with the issue.
He was directing a highly successful team and the more success they were having, the more the team was growing. The team’s size (and responsibilities have doubled in the past year and were scheduled to do the same in the coming year.
The difficulty was that Robert, one of the team members, was constantly dragging his feet on highly urgent matters that range from new hires to team goals and individual responsibilities. Robert is a systematic thinker and is not going to be unnecessarily hurried through important topics. Robert is a lone voice. The other team members are all shoot-from-the-hip type of people who are getting more and more frustrated as the backlog of decisions keeps getting longer.
My client explained this background to me and then asked if we could use our coaching time to figure out what he should do. Here’s how things went from my side.
First, I asked questions of make sure I understood what it was my client wanted. Basically, he wanted to use our time to think aloud about this issue and to decide on a course of action.
Second, I asked permission to try something new. “Could we try something new? I’d like to give you three different reactions to what you’ve told me and then, after each one, give you the opportunity to decide what you would do. How does that sound?”
Third, I offered a perspective in a very excited voice. “Wow, this is great that you’ve got somebody who’s willing to offer a different opinion. How are you going to support Robert?” We then talked through that viewpoint.
Fourth, I offered a perspective in a depressed voice. “This is a tough situation. What will you do to get Robert in line with everyone else?” We then talked through this viewpoint.
Fifth, I blamed my client. “Sounds like this is all your fault for letting it get this far. What would you like to do now?” My client laughed. Awareness is raised. I again asked, “What do you want to do now?” His answers were brilliant!
What other questions would you ask to support your client in situations like this?